As far as gifts, I don’t like giving cash. Even gift cards can be a little weird (though usually I’ve gotten them through points programs, so I’m even cheaper than they think!).

Frankly, I have very few qualms about weddings — do what makes you happy. One of my few caveats, though, is DO NOT ASK FOR CASH. I think it’s tacky beyond belief. I understand not wanting “things” but if people want to give you cash, they’ll give you cash. It would make me uncomfortable for my friends to have their hands out. Perhaps it’s because we’re broke. There are times we can afford to get friends presents, but generally speaking all my friends just don’t bother with gifts for birthdays and such. We take each other out for a drink. For our wedding a year ago, my friends were very generous, but we also made sure to register in places with affordable things.

I am simply a firm believer that you don’t ask for cash. If you want help with the honeymoon, do one of those registries. That seems cool, but it’s a way for people to not have to hand over an envelope of money. That just seems… weird.

I really admired a pair of friends who got married. They both made comfortable incomes, they’d had their house together for a few years, so they asked that donations be made to charities, then listed a couple of their favorites.

I can’t say I’m that selfless, but wouldn’t the world be a better place if more of us were?
.-= Abigail´s last blog ..Extended stay hotels and the virtues of moving on spec =-.

As a kid, I think I received a quarter per tooth.
.-= Susanne´s last blog ..A second opinion saved me $1832 =-.

I think you could almost compare it to the Italian tradition- remember the scene in Goodfellas, when the mob family gives them all the money at the wedding? It’s a bit like that. People tend to give money and plants, which I think is lovely.

As for weddings, I’m 25 and have been married just over 2 years. We have had A LOT of weddings to go to recently. Thanks goodness we only have 1 this year. Last year we had 8 to go to! 5 of them being back home… a 2 hour drive. Which was hard when gas was at it’s most expensive then add in tux/hotel when your dh is in a couple of them. We settled for gift cards for most of them because we were short on time. Many people opt for Bed Bath and Beyond and Target as their registries – the nearest ones are 1 hour away. For the last wedding last year we got the couple 3 1/2-size bottles of local Amana wine for only $12. Local wine is delicious and around here is a reasonable price. The couple loved the uniqueness and were excited to have a date night in to drink it.
.-= Kristin´s last blog ..Free Organic Baby Layette Giveaway =-.

As for the gifting for adults, I just give what’s in my heart (and wallet). If they want to compare me to someone else, it’s their problem.

Kelly, thanks for keeping up with my blog. I appreciate knowing that people out there care and think of our pain.
.-= Emily´s last blog ..Joy and Pain =-.

About the gifts….don’t feel cheap for giving less cash than what you think the couple might be expecting. Give what you’re comfortable with and be done with it. I am of the opinion that young people today (20′s and early 30′s) expect to start their married life with the best of everything or in other words, the same standard of living their parents have (which they’ve become accustomed to at home). However, they forget that for their parents it took them 25+ years to get there. This is evident in the size of their homes, the way they’re decorated, the cars they drive, country club memberships, etc. My advice – start at the bottom and work your way up so you’ll appreciate it. If you start at the top, what have you got to look forward to.

I’ll get off my soapbox now. Sorry for ranting.
.-= Nancy´s last blog ..t-shirts happen =-.